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Sunday, February 26, 2006

Mardi Gras!

Yesterday, the bunch of us went to a neighboring town to witness the Mardi Gras celebrations. What a pah-tay. The parade was a visual delight. The rest of the party was a spectacular spectacle of debauchery that we expected it would be. Not surprisingly, I was the only guy with a turban on. Most of the crowd was friendly or neutral and overall it was a nice not easily forgettable experience. Only twice did a few jerks call me Osama. I met a few other Sikhs there too. They were all monas and hence were deprived of the attention that I received.

On the way back home, in the car, my non-Indian friends were sympathetic and curious. They told me that one cannot do anything about other people's ignorance. And I told them what I have said several times before. I am really neither scared of nor bothered by any of that. In order to maintain my reputation of a "whiner", I added that what bugs me is when I get these damn rejections from Sikh girls coz I am too hairy. They all made me shut-up and told me to use my charms to win them over. Easier said than done. But watch out ladies, Hairy Harry is coming to steal your heart away. "In your dreams", I heard somebody say. Later on, the rest of us also whined about the fact that we were all still singles and had to go back to our humble lonely abodes. The brotherhood of bachelors. And the usual crap.

Anyways, all this is meant to take some heat away from the fierce battle that is going on in the "comments" section. Chill guys.

BTW, it seems like my sister, Puneet2 is trying to turn the tables on me. Well, it so happens that I started this whole blog just to tell people how young Sikh women are rejecting Sikh guys because of "hair" issues. I am sure you might have experienced some discrimination at the hands of some fundamentalists or whatever but surely I don't see that in my local Gurdwara. Mona Sikhs seem to be as much a part of the fractious management committees as any other kind of Sikh. At any rate, like I said I am not in favor of labeling monas as lesser Sikhs unless they feel that way in their own hearts. I can't argue about what is written where simply because I have neither the knowledge nor the erudition to prove that. I certainly believe Sikhi is more than just hair and other outward symbols but so far all I have experienced is more and more of younger Sikhs labeling those who do keep their hair as hyperreligious, orthodox or fundamentalist. I admit that my experiences are limited but so far I have only seen the turbaned Sikhs to be subjected to a bad attitude, both from outside the community and from within.

I am the last person to be hung up about the hair issue, even though it might not appear that way. It is a personal decision and although I can try to educate others about my thoughts, I do not believe in imposing my thoughts on others. My marriage is not going to be a tug-of-war between who should and who shouldn't keep their hair. Please. I care more about people than their hair or their castes or whatever. I expect my wife to accept me the way I am and she can expect no less from me. I have my personal belief system that I intend to nurture and follow for my lifetime. She is entitled to do the same. I am going to love her for who she is, which is a multitude of small things and not just for one isolated aspect. All I am saying is people should not judge people on whether they have facial hair or not and whether they tie a turban or not.

5 Comments:

Blogger grey said...

I have to admit (inspite of the whining) your blog is pretty addictive, does keep one interested in checking back, It will be a great journey for all your blog readers, to see you now and when you finally FIND a Wife ! This has like become a saga !

7:28 AM, February 27, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what kind of a person are u looking for?have u posted ur profile on any matrimonial site?if yes then i would like to know more.

Best wishes

9:46 AM, February 27, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just thought this song applicable to this situation.

"She's A Mystery To Me"
Darkness falls and she
Will take me by the hand
Take me to some twilight land
Where all but love is gray
Where I can't find my way
Without her as my guide

Night falls, I'm cast beneath her spell
Daylight comes, our heaven turns to hell
Am I left to burn, and burn eternally
She's a mystery to me

She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl

In the night of love
Words tangled in her hair
Words soon to disappear
A love so sharp it cut
Like a switchblade to my heart
Words tearing me apart

She tears again my bleeding heart
I wanna run, she's pulling me apart
Fallen angel cries and I just melt away
She's a mystery to me

She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl

Haunted by her side
It's a darkness in her eyes
That so enslaves me
But if my love is blind
Then I don't want to see
She's a mystery to me

Night falls, I'm cast beneath her spell
Daylight comes, our heaven turns to hell
Am I left to burn, and burn eternally
She's a mystery to me

She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl
She's a mystery girl

8:13 PM, February 27, 2006  
Blogger Mogli said...

Hey Harry, came across your blog.

It seems that your notiion is that US sikh women absolutely dislike turbaned sikhs due to an assortment of reasons. Currently, I do not think it is completely correct. It is true that a turban and a beard gives a fuzzy look, and puts me (and you?) at a significant disadvantage. It is equally true that liking somebody takes much much more than looks (unless you are Adonis reborn). This way, almost everybody has something wrong with them, and that thing is their disadvantage.
You should concentrate on your positives, which I am sure you have aplenty.
As for me, I am a turbaned sikh guy, more or less in your status (did undergrad in india, came to the US for masters etc etc).
I am 25, and my agenda is to find someone my self over the next 2 years. If I succeed, good. If I don't, I hope my parents will find someone.
I have never dated yet, and have been turned down 4 times, once by a sikh girl. Sometimes I think they were because of the way. My other friends (girls) have tried hard to convince me that they were not, they say that I am quite good looking, and my pug and beard is actually an advantage coz it makes me more interesting. It might as well be my temper, or my rigidity on some random things.
So be happy, improve things you can improve upon, and stop worrying about others. Maybe one tangible thing you might want to do is change your search set from american sikh women to indian sikh women, somebody who comes from similar background as you!
Chardi Kala!
Take care
Mogli of the Jungle

11:02 PM, February 28, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Try Sikhnet.com.. and go to the matrimony section ..
Some grls only want turbaned Sikhs there ...

Best of Luck!


OAS

8:58 AM, March 02, 2006  

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